Isn't that supposed to be "stars," folks? Apparently not, when you're talking about the uber-intellectuals that make their way to the Bachelor. Dude, clouds do not align. And even if they did, why would you think that is good luck?
I don't even know where to begin from last night. Talk about information superload! I felt like one of our darling friends (not to be named publicly) when she doesn't take her ADD medicine. Let me start with my absolute favorite moment of the night. Three words for you. Fred and Noelle. Fred won our hearts as the midwestern lawyer during Deanna's season and from that moment on, we've been rooting for him. Okay, so we actually forgot he existed for the past 6 months but besides that, we've been rooting for him. And dear Noelle. I know I might have confused you with the "Meeps" girl from Matt Grant's season, but we've always had a soft spot for you and only wish you the best. Talk about two great people finding true love. I might have teared up watching that segment.
But then I was quickly taken back to reality as we watched Trista and Ryan parade their (albeit adorable) baby Max on cable TV. Listen, I'm happy they actually made a marriage work after this show, but what annoys me is how Trista so obviously is milking ABC and her 10 minutes of fame for ALL IT IS WORTH. However, maybe Trista is just a little more clever than we've given her credit for. Every six months, she appears on another Bachelor special, probably gets some type of compensation (duh!) and can live it up in her beautiful Colorado home while her husband fights fires. Touche, Trista, touche. You not only had your entire wedding and honeymoon paid for by ABC but you've also managed to con them into practically paying for your home and entire perfect life.
And then we had Charlie and sweet, sweet Sarah. From the look on our shell-shocked former Bachelor's face, it doesn't look like he knew Sarah was going to out his alcoholism in front of millions of viewers*. I heard Jerry didn't even know Charlie was a little too keen on the bottle. Let's see how long they last after that revelation. If we've learned nothing else from watching the Bachelor, we've learned that a man doesn't like a woman who makes him look weak. Or a woman who won't say, "I love you" after 6 weeks of dating. Those damn closed off bitches who say "I think I'm falling in love with you" or "I want to be with you forever" and think they're going to get the final rose. To hell with them.
See, what did I tell you? ADD!
*Millions of viewers OR 8 people sitting in my living room.
I don't even know where to begin from last night. Talk about information superload! I felt like one of our darling friends (not to be named publicly) when she doesn't take her ADD medicine. Let me start with my absolute favorite moment of the night. Three words for you. Fred and Noelle. Fred won our hearts as the midwestern lawyer during Deanna's season and from that moment on, we've been rooting for him. Okay, so we actually forgot he existed for the past 6 months but besides that, we've been rooting for him. And dear Noelle. I know I might have confused you with the "Meeps" girl from Matt Grant's season, but we've always had a soft spot for you and only wish you the best. Talk about two great people finding true love. I might have teared up watching that segment.
But then I was quickly taken back to reality as we watched Trista and Ryan parade their (albeit adorable) baby Max on cable TV. Listen, I'm happy they actually made a marriage work after this show, but what annoys me is how Trista so obviously is milking ABC and her 10 minutes of fame for ALL IT IS WORTH. However, maybe Trista is just a little more clever than we've given her credit for. Every six months, she appears on another Bachelor special, probably gets some type of compensation (duh!) and can live it up in her beautiful Colorado home while her husband fights fires. Touche, Trista, touche. You not only had your entire wedding and honeymoon paid for by ABC but you've also managed to con them into practically paying for your home and entire perfect life.
And then we had Charlie and sweet, sweet Sarah. From the look on our shell-shocked former Bachelor's face, it doesn't look like he knew Sarah was going to out his alcoholism in front of millions of viewers*. I heard Jerry didn't even know Charlie was a little too keen on the bottle. Let's see how long they last after that revelation. If we've learned nothing else from watching the Bachelor, we've learned that a man doesn't like a woman who makes him look weak. Or a woman who won't say, "I love you" after 6 weeks of dating. Those damn closed off bitches who say "I think I'm falling in love with you" or "I want to be with you forever" and think they're going to get the final rose. To hell with them.
See, what did I tell you? ADD!
*Millions of viewers OR 8 people sitting in my living room.
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