Not Even Remotely Identical

Hometown dates have always been my favorite-- mostly because the moms, dads, and crazy boxer wielding grannies only get --literally-- 15 minutes of fame. But they usually use this time wisely and manage to make quite the impression. This year was a bit tamer than usual; the families are less protective of the boys so less threats occur, but that's ok by me… there's enough drama on this season already. Watching this year's crop of families, it struck me how much you can tell about a guy from his siblings… and here's what they had to say this week:

Ed: Ok, we didn't get to meet Ed's family. This was the most depressing thing about this episode (Yes, even more depressing than having Jillian tell Kiptyn's mom that she makes it hard for herself to be happy, then demonstrating exactly what she means by keeping Wes around, again….) I'm sure Ed's family would have loved Jillian, because she's adorable and bubbly. But what I really wanted to know is if Ed has an adorable younger brother. And if he's single.

My future brother in law.

Wes: Watching Wes's sisters swoon over him like the Twilighters over Rob Pattinson, I kind of wanted to gag. Wes is delusional, his family is delusional, and it has worn off on Jillian. So rather than harp on a topic that's been covered, I will say this: If everyone you come in contact with can't stand to be around you, don't flatter yourself, it's probably not jealousy.

Michael: I don't want to say anything negative about the guy who had the classiest, most dignified exit from a reality show ever aired, so I'll say this to Michael's Not-Remotely-Identical Twin: Marriage is not a group sport. All the "We want to be good husbands before We are good fathers…We've always wanted to get married young" stuff was a little confusing. Does Michael want to get married young, or do you want to get married young? Not only are you not identical, but you're also not Siamese. Find your own girl.

Jesse: In keeping with his startling resemblance to Beast - in both human and beast incarnations - Jesse's brother was exactly like a character from a movie… He's that socially awkward sibling you hide except for requisite family events to keep him from making uncomfortable remarks. I mean, since when has "Have you gotten naked yet?" been an acceptable 'getting to know you' question? Think Wedding Crashers. Think the Hangover --This guy totally has a wolf pack. Whatever you do, I would think twice before marrying an apple that fell out of the same tree.